everysinglething

All day today I have felt like a crazy person, I can't stop fidgeting, theres no way I can sit still. I feel so so jittery. I haven't had any coke zero or pepsi max today so that could be why. I am probs having withdrawl symptoms. Even now I am shaking my leg around and clenching my jaw. I'm biting my cheeks and flexing my muscles. Every 30 seconds I check my email or my phone even though I know there will be nothing. Sighhhhh
I started my liquid fast again today, I have had a milkshake, some milo, and 2 diet ginger beers. I'm still at work and I have nothing to do (well theres heaps to do but I don't want to) so I keep thinking about food. Its not so much that I want to eat, I'm just bored and theres not much I can do here. My boyfriend is coming over tonight, I'm not sure if I will have to eat.
I have been very headachy today, again its probs the lack of pepsi and coke. And I'm exhausted.
I don't really have anything interesting to say. I wish I lived with a friend.
Here is a quote I love from the book Wintergirls

Why? You want to know why?
Step into a tanning booth and fry yourself for two or three days. After your skin bubbles and peels off, roll in coarse salt, then pull on long underwear woven from spun glass and razor wire. Over that goes your regular clothes, as long as they are tight.
Smoke gunpowder and go to school to jump through hoops, sit up and beg, and roll over on command. Listen to the whispers that curl into your head at night, calling you ugly and fat and stupid and bitch and whore and worst of all, “a disappointment.” Puke and starve and cut and drink because you don’t want to feel any of this. Puke and starve and drink and cut because you need the anesthetic and it works. For a while. But then the anesthetic turns into poison and by then it’s too late because you are mainlining it now, straight into your soul. It is rotting you and you can’t stop.
Look in a mirror and find a ghost. Hear every heartbeat scream that everysinglething is wrong with you.
“Why?” is the wrong question.
Ask “Why not?”